% womenrules.tex
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% The Rules With Females.
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\begin{document}


\newcommand\male	{\textsc{Male}}
\newcommand\female	{\textsc{Female}}
\newcommand\rules	{\textsc{Rules}}
\newcommand\therules	{\textsc{The Rules}}


\begin{center}
\Huge\bfseries\
\fontsize{15mm}{15mm}\selectfont
THE RULES
\end{center}
\vspace{5mm}

They say that men and women often misunderstand each other, especially
when emotion, be it passion or anger, or even a lack of emotion, such
as apathy or boredom, is involved in the language of love.

But all of this can be avoided by applying \therules.

The following ordinances are one of those circulars which appear
mysteriously in all sorts of workplaces, to be passed around by
sniggering readers and surreptitiously photocopied and faxed to someone
else. No hint of the author's identity or sex is shown, or the date of
first publication given.

It is therefore possible that \therules\ are a document of some
antiquity, and ``More To Life'' can neither confirm nor deny that the
original document  was translated from hieroglyphics found in an
archaeological excavation in ancient Mesopotamia.

It is obvious that \therules\ will survive political correctness, and
indeed, might well be responsible for inspiring feminists across the
world.

\begin{itemize}

\item
	The \female\ always makes \therules.
\item
	\therules\ are subject to change at any time without prior
	notification.
\item
	No \male\ can possibly know all \therules.
\item
	If the \female\ suspects the \male\ knows all \therules\ she
	must immediately change some of \therules.
\item
	The \female\ is never wrong.
\item
	If the \female\ is wrong, it is due to a misunderstanding which
	was a direct result of something the \male\ did or said wrong.
\item
	The \male\ must apologise immediately for causing said
	misunderstanding.
\item
	The \male\ must never change his mind without the express
	permission in writing of the \female.
\item
	the \female\ has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
\item
	The \male\ must remain calm at all times, unless the
	\female\ wants him to be angry and/or upset.
\item
	The \female\ must, under no circumstances, let the \male\ know
	whether or not she wants him to be angry and/or upset.
\item
	The \male\ is expected to mind read at all times.
\item
	the \male\ who doesn't abide by \therules\ can't take the heat,
	lacks backbone, is a wimp.
\item
	Any attempt by the \male\ to document \therules\ could result
	in bodily harm.
\item
	If the \female\ has PMS, all \therules\ may be null and void.
\item
	The \female\ is ready when \emph{she} is ready.
\item
	The \male\ must be ready at all times.

\end{itemize}	


\end{document}